This piece has been written by Lakshmi T. Nambiar (Batch of 2023), with inputs from the Quirk Team.
DISCLAIMER: The following article is a work of satire. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons or actual events is purely coincidental, and is not to be taken as true.
Leading Laa College kickstarts clinical legal education by breaking into students' room
"The best way to learn about privacy rights is for students to practically apply their knowledge to real life situations.”
- anonymous academic, resident of Ivory Towers
February 21, 2022 | Special Quirk Investigative Team
On-ground correspondents, reporting live from Nagarbhavi Laa College, have informed the Quirk team that students’ hostel rooms are currently being occupied by individuals from the Surreptitiously (Un)Authorised Invitees (S.A.I.) organisation. The hostel rooms had previously been in use by students of the Laa College as part of the residential programme at the Laa College. The rooms had been vacated in the month of February for the students’ break, but the students had been given permission to retain their mattresses and other personal belongings in the room.
The Laa College had recently announced the start of several clinical legal education programmes. The Quirk Team believes that this must be the most reasonable explanation for the Laa College letting out students' personal rooms which contained their private belongings. A simulated situation such as this would be the perfect way for students to learn about the various aspects of privacy, and how the same can be enforced. An anonymous source confirmed the same, informing us that the students had deliberately not been informed in advance, in order to give the issue a realistic feel. This, the source further says, was also done to ensure bedding for individuals from SAI but that was never an important consideration.
The release of bits and pieces of information was also simulated in a similar manner in order to emulate how a real-life situation would develop. The Laa College strategically conveyed only half the information to SBA representatives in order to add nuance to the issue - would the SBA's lack of protest imply consent on behalf of the student body? The students will now have to research and argue the case in the following week, when they return to campus. When students questioned the timing of the issue, given that exams commence the next week, they were informed that legal disputes wait for no one, and as budding lawyers they must be prepared for the grind of the legal job market - something that this would prepare them for. The Laa College's attention to detail is a testimony to its dedication to the students' education.
When a few students raised concerns about issues of hygiene, especially given the pandemic that continues to affect the world, the students were asked - “Do courts stop functioning in the midst of the pandemic? Does justice pause for a microorganism? Legal education too, must go on, uninterrupted by petty concerns like a global pandemic.” In the world of the Laa College, social distancing, virtual hearings, regular sanitization, masks and basic hygiene practices are things of an ancient past warranting no attention or consideration anymore. This, of course, makes complete sense - in order for students to get a grasp of handling legal issues, they must work even in the most trying circumstances, and adapt to actuality. “Welcome to the real world,” we’re told when we enter Laa College - “it sucks, you’re going to love it.” And how could we not, when every trimester wonderful surprises await.
Another anonymous on-ground source reported the loss of certain valuable belongings. We have been assured, however, that all of this is part of the clinical simulation. As we are taught in the Laa College, live cases are often not restricted to one aspect of law - they permeate into several areas of legal practice - constitutional, criminal, civil. No doubt, the Laa College wishes for this course to be as thorough as possible, and cover all bases, to allow for students to explore a variety of legal aspects. It is certainly this astuteness of the Laa College that makes it the Harvard of the East.
Several students have also been complaining about the clinical simulation interrupting their plans of flying back to the Laa College a few days earlier, and the impracticality of rebooking flight tickets given the exorbitant rates and very real financial constraints. This, however, seems to be a real-life issue that is beyond the scope of the clinical legal simulation and was not accounted for. However, we must cut the Laa College some slack - this is the first program of its kind in the country, and there are bound to be glitches. Furthermore, making last-minute moderations based on such externalities could skew the results of the meticulously and strategically planned simulation.
While there have been rumours of the Laa College starting an OYO-like room service, we did not find any sources confirming the same. We truly, earnestly, whole-heartedly, and with full conviction believe that the Nagarbhavi Laa College would never profit off violating its students rights and would only take any decisions that were in the students’ very best interests. The Quirk Team salutes Laa College's courage, conviction and vision in starting this one-of-a-kind educational program for its students.
DISCLAIMER: The following article is a work of satire. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons or actual events is purely coincidental, and is not to be taken as true.
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